tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-53051492012-02-16T08:56:59.184Zprachinoreply@blogger.comBlogger5531100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-58522643692959782872011-11-18T16:44:00.002Z2011-11-18T16:44:42.062Z

Pulled out into wakefulness floating at the edge of slumber's space. The memories hang, drift round the heart accompany the day. Conflating of sensations and truths. Emotions betray concocted experiences Colouring the time without permission New dreams, happenings, memories, tomorrow

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-13014368056229037382010-11-03T15:39:00.002Z2010-11-03T15:55:03.307Z

Am I really an adult? Already? It certainly feels like it. I'm working, doing a PhD, own a car, live with T and tend to be the one that holds it together when family stuff starts happening. And there is definitely family stuff happening right now. I'm also trying to make friends at college, but it's not so easy when everyone else lives there I and don't. That'll come in time though I hope.I look

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-39391570421896048092010-09-30T16:38:00.005+01:002010-09-30T16:46:38.839+01:00

I wish I could get away somewhere. I have this overwhelming urge to see a new place. A totally different, alien place. It's not that I particularly need a holiday - I just went to an immensely beautiful area of Scotland last month. No, I want to go somewhere chaotic, foreign and new.But, I'm about to start a PhD, need to save my holiday for when dad goes away, and need someone to go with who can

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-7063857350375338692009-10-02T21:43:00.003+01:002009-10-02T22:04:01.929+01:00

Also, was just looking through some old posts and found one about a run I went on a year or so ago. I used to really enjoy it, and oddly especially at night. However, I've found that I've stopped running over the past few months.I tried to train for a 10k in July just gone, and found that my asthma was really a problem. Running started becoming a chore, something I had to do for a certain amount

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-48198087018391037382009-10-02T21:35:00.002+01:002009-10-02T21:38:46.043+01:00

There are days when I feel like I'm starting all over again. Which may not seem so bad for someone in their mid twenties, but somehow, it does feel bad. And I know that there's nothing I can do except let time do its thing. I guess one thing I have learnt over the past few years is that there are some things that you just can't force and some things you just can't change.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-13446911376674275182009-06-22T23:31:00.002+01:002009-06-22T23:34:46.622+01:00

Ever wanted to feel a certain way, but no matter what you do, you just can't shake the feeling you've got?Sometimes I wish there was a way to instantly change the way you feel.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-50975328038446051322009-05-27T23:25:00.002+01:002009-05-27T23:30:26.475+01:00

I've just realised that I've had this blog since I was 19 years old. 19! I can't believe how much I've changed and gone through in 6 years. I have a steady job, a boyfriend, considering buying a house. Am I really a grown up?!I'm taking an evening class in political philosophy at the moment which I'm really enjoying. I have to write an essay (yay! - no really, I'm excited!) so found myself in the

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-27232027769970949812009-05-27T23:06:00.001+01:002009-05-27T23:08:21.761+01:00

Do you ever feel like everything is upside down?

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-23041486494703417292008-06-11T23:38:00.002+01:002008-06-11T23:43:36.409+01:00

I realise I haven't posted on here for quite a while now - I guess I'm just really happy at the moment and don't feel the need for this. However, I just read this article on the BBC which I think is absolutely amazing. It's something that happens to me every month, yet it never occurred to me that I might see it some day. This might be corny, but the existence of live never ceases to amaze me :)

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-11436220953114626432008-02-29T23:27:00.002Z2008-02-29T23:28:06.392Z

Been wondering lately - if you're able to swim...what's the problem with rocking the boat? Hmmm.

prachinoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-31598023302321159712008-02-16T10:54:00.004Z2008-02-16T11:22:15.709Z

I saw Varekai with the Cirque Du Soleil at the Royal Albert Hall yesterday. It left me speechless. I've always wanted to see them ever since I saw them on the Royal Variety Show as a kid, and I can safely say that I was not disappointed. You go from holding your breath out of fear for the performers, to being awestruck at the beauty of it all, to disbelief that the people in front of you are

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-10626756567939393502008-02-11T21:38:00.000Z2008-02-11T21:44:57.404Z

1. Have updated the post below to include the BBC link.2. I got my exam results and I got a high merit - WOHOO! Apparently I was just off a distinction, dammit. Not only that, the paper I was saying I might have failed in the post below...is apparently the paper I did better in!! The person giving me my results asked me if I was more quantative that qualitative - which bewildered me! Anyone that

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-62192759313080400302008-02-10T19:30:00.000Z2008-02-11T21:38:31.397Z

The BBC just rang me and said they want to use a picture I submitted on their website tomorrow -YAY! :DHere's the link! Mine is picture 4.I've had a lovely weekend, I think the weather has helped but wandered through Regent's Park yesterday and sat down with a book for a bit, then later went to watch some live jazz with friends which was enjoyable. Then today a friend and I sketched at the

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-91935863090487367022008-02-04T22:23:00.000Z2008-02-04T22:28:30.727Z

This is one of my favourite songs, from one of my favourite movie soundtracks - "Go"Song For Holly - EstheroI can make you want meI can make you think you need me too...I can reassure you that all your lies you tell yourself are true...And if you wont let me goIm just harder to hold, noIll never let you gain control, no, no...Im not myself latelyIm not even sure I know meBut I'm worth more than

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-83599490528285577772008-02-01T22:03:00.000Z2008-02-01T22:18:10.941Z

After 2 weeks of recording my peak flow, the doctor told me I have mild asthma today.Asthma - me?! I grew up watching my brother and dad have asthma, but somehow it never occurred to me that I would develop it. I mean, it really is mild - I just get tightness in my chest sometimes, I've never had a problem breathing. After discussing it with the doctor he (and I) think it's due to pollution, and

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-30832260244569907222008-01-25T23:56:00.000Z2008-01-26T00:09:16.909Z

Some people can be SO FUCKING INSENSITIVE. Arrgh!!!Is my anger coming accross at all? I thought I controlled myself pretty well though. Didn't burst into tears, didn't scream and shout, I just looked at him in disbelief. I think I was more shocked than anything else. Maybe it wasn't that big a thing to him, but it was to me.Anyway, good thing is that it's motivated me to start karate again!! I

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-55872675560466689732008-01-20T00:35:00.000Z2008-01-20T00:48:12.701Z

I was on my way to a friend's house this evening, when a lady asked me for money as I was buying a ticket. Normally I say sorry and move on, but something about this woman made me stop and listen. It probably helped that she was polite (she apologised for interrupting my ticket buying and said she'd wait till I was done), then when I was done , she proceeded to say that she wasn't a beggar and

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-2947194046409319072008-01-14T21:49:00.000Z2008-01-14T22:02:34.875Z

I went for a run yesterday. It was so liberating, running with the wind, the rain cooling me down and the ground glistening all around me. I felt really alive, and despite the fact that I was running on roads, I really felt part of nature. I was running and thinking how amazing it is, that if there is no god (which I highly suspect there isn't) then that means that we really *are* part of the

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-81613472937922211312008-01-10T21:37:00.000Z2008-01-10T21:39:01.844Z

It's strange how hurt can switch to anger...and not even at the person that hurt you, but at yourself for letting them do it.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-59908545858098231652008-01-09T18:01:00.000Z2008-01-09T18:12:21.806Z

I am not a stressy person at all. I'm usually the one calming other people down, telling them they/we can deal with whatever the problem is. I usually believe it too. If it's a problem I can do something about, then I do that something. If I can't do anything about it then I can prepare myself for the consequences and get on with life. Maybe it's because of the household I grew up in, it doesn't

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-56192279030608868432008-01-08T21:10:00.000Z2008-01-08T21:19:13.700Z

Ok, I just sang a song for you all to cheer myself up, but blogger doesn't want me to upload it :( It's only little blogger, please?No?Ok then. Think I need to sign up to a media storage site but I can't really be bothered to sign up to yet another thing I don't need!

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-76192872536009942972008-01-04T01:06:00.000Z2008-01-04T01:13:39.547Z

I'm revising for exams next week (eep!) and I came accross this point which in hindsight seems obvious, but I've never really thought about before. I don't have time to go into it right now (I will later), but I wanted to get it on here so I don't forget.It's basically saying that the things we feel really matter, only matter because we are thinking of them. If we don't think about it, then it

prachinoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-66931443892584511252008-01-01T22:30:00.000Z2008-01-01T22:32:40.087Z

This song is much better when heard sung, but I love it and I'll blog it if I want to :)"Galaxy Song", from 'The Meaning of Life' by Monty PythonJust remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolvingAnd revolving at nine hundred miles an hour.Thas orbiting at ninety miles a second, so it's reckoned,A sun that is the source of all our power.The sun, and you and me, and all the stars that

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-12366571955804315762007-12-31T00:13:00.000Z2007-12-31T00:15:59.720Z

Two things:1. It may all look the same to you, but believe me I'm pretty proud of myself!2. Is wanting to be listened to and not just heard really so much to ask?

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-21144924867456992952007-12-30T02:04:00.000Z2007-12-30T12:22:00.648Z

Cold winds wrap loose around my heartBut caring hands soon follow with warmth.The answers are questions I fear to askA quiet mind follows the slippery path.There will be one moment to find the truth.One moment to gage the mood.Time slips away into the night,as starlight guides my path to the fightThe struggle ahead is known and long.It begins with a kiss and ends with a song.Moonlight flickers

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-75379657905015496612007-12-29T17:37:00.000Z2007-12-29T17:38:43.968Z

You know, this Christmas - I got exactly what I needed :)

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-56898003027655193782007-12-20T22:03:00.000Z2007-12-20T22:21:45.358Z

Nice things:-I am home, away from smelly London-I am re-united with my dogs (ok, and parents)-I have access to all my relaxing activities like my piano and art stuffNot so nice things:-I am revising for exams-I am being distracted by requests from my parents (that don't seem to have comprehended that I have exams)-I am cold

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-74783714229257496842007-11-26T17:37:00.000Z2007-11-26T17:39:00.994Z

Hues When I was low I used to think of youAnd life would seem better, a rosier hue.Then day by day I had to learn againThat things change, that you can’t be afraid. Little by little, you closed in on your wishConvinced of it legitimacy, we went to the brinkPropelled by a haze of jealousy and fearDisguised by your happiness, of when I was near. After so much time you

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-87400004812159897412007-11-21T14:52:00.000Z2007-11-21T14:52:07.088Z

I've been thinking a lot about politics of late, wondering just how much of a democracy we in the UK are. Now, I've never studied politics, but my impression is that a democractic government represents and acts for it's population, through the process of elections. The government's basic role is to carry out the will of the people and maintain public institutions such as schools, the emergency

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-46192561504160347932007-11-16T21:39:00.000Z2007-11-16T22:23:27.652Z

For quite a long time now, I've thought that knowing why you believe something is really important; that when you do something, you should know why you're doing it and not just because someone told you so. After all - it's your life, shouldn't you be allowed, as an adult, to make the decision on whether something is a good/desirable use of your time?I've always wondered what the world would be

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-85461173118864403562007-11-08T22:17:00.000Z2007-11-08T22:27:55.312Z

Been meaning to link to this for *ages* but I just re-read it so here it is:Is Happiness Enough?It's basically I debate I had with myself a lot when I was growing up which this person articulates quite well. I also think the point he makes about ignoring the suffering on your own doorstep is a very true one. Maybe because it's easier to deal with suffering that you mainly experience through words

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-43617900255350976402007-10-27T17:53:00.000+01:002007-10-27T17:54:27.697+01:00

Alone again. :'(

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-77492082440894859322007-10-20T13:03:00.000+01:002007-10-20T13:39:41.826+01:00

I have a 20-25 minute walk to uni everyday at the moment. The beginning bit of my walk is usually pretty peaceful and I've found is a good time to think. On one of these walks I found myself thinking about my identity and how other people perceive me. I think I have a fairly good idea of myself being in my early 20s and all, but I still haven't quite figured out how my perception fits in with

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-69635594218100113432007-09-10T12:08:00.000+01:002007-09-10T12:10:28.802+01:00

Sometimes I wonder if I let myself drift a little too far out. Like when you go for a long walk, then realise that you have to walk the same distance again to reach home.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-74691777252157187512007-09-07T14:36:00.001+01:002007-09-07T14:36:50.390+01:00

Unaccustomed lungs gasp for unpolluted airBody weighed down by millennia of tradition. Precious stones glint under artificial lights.Each one reflecting a distorted image.Pampered skin and then her soft brown handsIntricately decorated by a red-brown paste.Bathing herself in the air’s humidityIt’s stifling presence clouding her thoughts.She belongs to neither this world or thatNever quite fitting

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-8458184928131698372007-08-28T20:21:00.000+01:002007-08-28T20:23:06.300+01:00

All I needed was the love you gave All I needed for another day And all I ever knew Only you

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-2095807114955641732007-08-17T14:35:00.000+01:002007-08-20T10:12:46.132+01:00

Sometimes I'm reminded how much more there is to the human brain than what we are consciously aware of. What made think of this specifically was on a (delayed!) train back to Manchester from London. I was reading Foundation and Earth - a great book (and series) and was totally engrossed. Then for no apparent reason I looked up, straight into the eyes of someone that was staring at me through the

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-3863551790482483082007-08-15T09:29:00.001+01:002007-08-15T09:30:19.119+01:00

Oh yeah, and if anyone is interested in seeing my holiday photos click on the photos link on the lefthand side of this page...

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-49220180141152643422007-08-15T09:26:00.000+01:002007-08-15T09:28:03.424+01:00

Man I am exhausted. Illness plus jetlag does not mix me thinks. On the plus side, picking up the keys for my new flat today - yay! :D

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-50414894944262100182007-08-12T23:46:00.000+01:002007-08-12T23:52:12.488+01:00

You know, when people speak of heartache, I always imagined it to be a figure of speech - but when you're emotionally stressed or upset about something, your heart really does ache.Just something I noticed and wanted to note...

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-11962293181082565552007-08-10T20:22:00.000+01:002007-08-10T20:26:46.220+01:00

Remembered one more thing I wanted to say about America - they have rubbish chocolate!!! I didn't have much while I was there, but what I did have had nothing on the European stuff. I mean, it's not as bad as Indian chocolate but is still not up to my standards I'm afraid :)mmm, chocolate.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-80584710637488273422007-08-10T13:08:00.000+01:002007-08-10T13:21:02.106+01:00

On the plane home I noticed something that I just thought I'd mention here. If you are in a friend's house with a bunch of other people, and someone needs waking up (for whatever reason), it is usually the person emotionally closest who will do it. Just through observation, it seems that people are usually aprehensive about waking people they do not know well - maybe because while some people may

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-3322273546049055572007-08-10T00:15:00.001+01:002007-08-10T00:36:22.988+01:00

Well I've just spent the past few weeks in the US travelling around and seeing people, and just got back home today. (Pictures to come)I arrived at New York, then went to Dallas, Sedona/Grand Canyon, and the San Francisco bay area. My overall impressions of America were that it's people are incredibly friendly, the food portions are humongous, the geography is vast, and despite what people say,

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-35320881068093641152007-07-11T11:09:00.000+01:002007-07-11T11:10:03.878+01:00

I've just joined technorati to see what it's all about. This post is mainly just to activate my account! :)Technorati Profile

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-80082648750979466382007-06-29T15:50:00.000+01:002007-06-29T18:29:18.505+01:00

A lot have people have been asking me what London was like - did I enjoy it? Mostly I say that I really enjoyed it, but that I couldn't live there forever. A year for my masters is no problem, but to settle there for the rest of my life? I don't think I could. It is an amazing city, full of opportunities and culture. But it is also full of rude, unhelpful people who are perfectly nice in

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-51435442366949136102007-06-27T23:09:00.000+01:002007-06-27T23:51:38.537+01:00

I don't even know where to start - there's so much I could write about.Well since this is a space for me, I'll start with the topic that seems to have been with me since I was a little girl and which has been bothering me lately. My weight.I wasn't overweight when I was a child, but I was made to feel I was, to the point where my self-esteem was so low I don't even like to think of it now. Then I

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-43875084979767257342007-06-19T00:01:00.000+01:002007-06-19T00:02:58.470+01:00

Man it's been 2 months since my last post - I think that might be the longest I've ever gone without posting. Well I have plenty to say, but I shall save it for when I'm not about to go to bed :)Update on it's I way, I promise...

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-45727372109315991242007-04-18T23:15:00.000+01:002007-04-19T00:27:43.750+01:00

Demos held an event about immigration the other evening. The discussion was based around a book called Immigrants: Your country needs them. The author was there as well as 3 other panelists and an audience of relevant and interested people. The sentiment of the book was good, but I wasn't convinced by his argument to be honest (though I haven't actually read the book...). That aside though, the

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-9424404120102751302007-03-29T22:05:00.001+01:002007-03-29T22:10:45.160+01:00

I've experienced so much in the past couple of weeks that I should have an essay to write on here - but to be honest, I haven't really had enough time to reflect on it. I just want to make the most of the short time I'm in London. It's odd though - had a wicked band reunion over the weekend, and it fell to me to write some lyrics for a song they'd just come up with. There was a time when I could

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-16096810528685249212007-03-10T22:04:00.000Z2007-03-10T22:05:28.206Z

You know, there are rare occasions when a conversation with a friend can make you feel more alone than before.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-46021708196810190882007-03-10T21:49:00.000Z2007-03-10T21:56:03.915Z

When you're teetering on the edge, with concentration you can often regain your balance alone. If someone is there with you, you can reach out to them to steady you. But if you reach out a hand expecting someone to be there, and you are alone, you don't concentrate on balancing by yourself.And you fall.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-89016437131807298102007-03-07T18:32:00.000Z2007-03-07T18:39:17.269Z

I got an internship with Demos - yay! Tis a think tank (if you don't what that is, click here). I had to get lucky sometime right? It's down in London, which is exciting because I get to live in London, but also scary because...I have to live in London! I got a week/10 days to find a place before I start...luckily I managed to find a decent place yesterday when I went down for a couple of days.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-30771149706793161922007-03-01T23:59:00.000Z2007-03-02T00:30:00.156Z

I read this article in The Times yesterday. I thought it was a fairly accurate description of what I grew up seeing. Every year we would travel from our suburban paradise in England, to India for at least 2 weeks.And I was thrown into a different world. One where the suffering of other human beings wasn't just obvious, it was clawing at your car window, sitting on the broken pavement outside your

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-33167471083769988702007-02-21T23:25:00.000Z2007-02-21T23:34:46.868Z

I don't even know how to express what I feel. All I know is that my heart feels heavy, and I don't know how to make it better.And I don't know who to ask.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-56941757422219553432007-02-21T19:03:00.000Z2007-02-21T19:17:21.398Z

On Karate...The sensei has started to separate the classes to kumite on Tuesdays and kata on Fridays. I kinda like kumite, but most of the time the idea of being in an actual fight scares the crap out of me (yes, I'm a girly wimp, so what?)But yesterday...I got such a buzz out of it. I was kicked in the chest (by accident) and while it hurt, and had she done it harder she would have broken a few

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-35512297865798776382007-02-15T16:24:00.000Z2007-02-15T17:20:21.884Z

*melodramatic mode on*Is it possible to die of period pain?*melodramatic mode off*

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-91928121419554503132007-02-14T13:07:00.000Z2007-02-14T15:15:12.718Z

On size zero...I was chatting to a girl in the changing rooms after karate yesterday when she announced that she needed to lose weight because she wants to be size zero. That is a horrible thought in itself, but this girl is already slim - no bigger than a size 8 (size zero is a UK size 4). She said her sister is a size zero, and that she wants to 'be like the models in the magazines'...those

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-3435179550895162012007-02-11T23:13:00.000Z2007-02-11T23:19:50.367Z

My god, what has happened to me? I don't mean to blow my own trumpet or anything, but I used to be vaguely interesting. All I do on here nowadays is whine about how lonely I am, or blah blah blah. I started this blog nearly 4 years ago because I wanted to have a record of the things I've seen and thought and, I suppose, felt. But still, there has been too much imbalance lately.I've had a yearning

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-54364052492849948632007-02-10T23:14:00.000Z2007-02-10T23:17:49.856Z

Ahem, when I said I needed someone to vent to in my last post, the porn industry wasn't exactly what I had in mind!!!Also, for people that do ever leave a comment - thank you! The only reason I haven't replied is that frickin' enetation won't let me for some reason! But all comments are appreciated and I don't mean to be rude by not replying! :)

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-36784422892650685322007-02-03T23:35:00.000Z2007-02-03T23:39:42.299Z

Man I could do with having someone to vent to right now. Like NOW. But, probably someone who won't take me too seriously!Maybe I will call someone? But it's late. But it is saturday.......But, meh. I can't express myself properly today - very fustrating!Traa for now kiddies. x

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-22261026351891438662007-01-29T18:19:00.000Z2007-01-29T19:37:26.074Z

We held a little exhibition over the weekend for Republic Day in India. My mum is involved with the organisation that was holding an event, and since we have hundreds and hundreds of photos of India at home (literally), we decided to use some of them - especially as quite a few of them look really professional - my dad and brother are actually really good.Anyhoo, here is a very small selection of

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-21349645222969229462007-01-27T00:20:00.000Z2007-01-27T00:29:23.836Z

My head is full of thoughts and my heart is full of feelings, but I feel like I have no-one to talk to about them. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of people about, but the things I am full of will offend those close to me, or I will feel liked I'm being judged, but nothing will be said.And so here I am, blogging. Is it really so much to want to have someone that you can talk to, that will

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-5432480083149369632007-01-23T18:47:00.001Z2007-01-23T18:47:53.388Z

Sometimes you offer yourself up to the world.But it's laughs echo round your heart, all it gives you is it's dirtChasing after a desire that drives you on and on.But it's just a conveyor belt, that everyone else trundles along.Everyone you've loved has always loved someone else even more.So you try in vain to let go, to leave your heart on the floor.You always tell strangers to follow

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-42072306266762759352007-01-21T11:41:00.000Z2007-01-21T12:08:02.379Z

Companionship"In some cases, the social support offered by an animal is greater than the support than another human could offer."

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-54322225794589815232007-01-13T21:30:00.000Z2007-01-13T21:31:44.530Z

The Stolen Child - WB YeatsWhere dips the rocky highland Of Sleuth Wood in the lake, There lies a leafy island Where flapping herons wake The drowsy water-rats; There we've hid our faery vats, Full of berries And of the reddest stolen cherries. Come away, O human child! To the waters and the wild

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-5432235765533486622007-01-09T22:59:00.000Z2007-01-09T23:24:16.900Z

It's times like this that I wish I believed in God. I don't just mean the knee jerk reaction of praying when you want something - that comes from being brought up in a religious family, it's a habit - not a belief.I think there are some people that just naturally believe in God - despite the evidence, well, lack of evidence...but I'm just not one of those people. I have no problem with this at

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-58833369096437922832007-01-01T14:08:00.000Z2007-01-01T16:02:06.855Z

On Beauty...As I've been getting older, I seem to find myself agreeing with all those cynical older women I heard talking when I was younger, realising that most of the time, life just doesn't have the hollywood happy endings. I've always had an awareness that if you want to attract men, you have to look good - full stop. My whole family certainly drilled that into me from a very young age (

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-91904811364500992002006-12-16T11:09:00.000Z2006-12-16T11:10:59.060Z

I passed my grading - wohoo! Now a yellow belt...only 6 more to go before I'm a black belt :s On the brightside though - I'm a third of the way there!:D

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-90861733910368400462006-12-13T22:57:00.000Z2006-12-13T23:03:08.108Z

It's funny...I've been feeling really upbeat these past few days, and I still am now... but the time for bed comes near, and I feel so empty inside.No matter how good a mood I'm in, there's always that feeling lurking away, the feeling that I'm alone, that no one wants me.And I just want it to go away.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-59623125532011242802006-12-08T13:37:00.000Z2006-12-08T15:52:30.039Z

I was chatting to my good friend G the other day when he showed me this quote by George Carlin on his theory of life - thought it was great!"The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death!What's that--a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards.You should die first, get it out of the

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-83955219384199954652006-12-03T19:35:00.000Z2006-12-03T19:38:34.073Z

SCREAM*Deep breath in*and *out*

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-78253871235287672332006-11-26T23:29:00.000Z2006-11-26T23:33:32.814Z

Snip. The clunk of wood on wood. The mechanism groans into action, slow to react after so long unused. However it was built well, the parts still function. Click, click, click - it's locked. The contents have grown too fragile for public view, the world too unreliable to be trusted. So with a kiss on the cheek to say goodbye, it goes into hiding, protected from the world until it is safe to come

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-73469245281669061962006-11-21T18:04:00.000Z2006-11-21T18:08:07.362Z

Got my hair done today...Funny how getting your hair done can be such a self esteem booster :)

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-29525665108456958582006-11-20T14:55:00.000Z2006-11-20T14:57:27.783Z

Just heard this song for the first time in ages...Strange and Beautiful - AqualungI've been watching your world from afar,I've been trying to be where you are,And I've been secretly falling apart, unseen.To me, you're strange and you're beautiful,You'd be so perfect with me but you just can't see,You turn every head but you don't see me.I'll put a spell on you,You'll fall asleep and I'll put a

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-44806478308148788982006-11-20T00:05:00.000Z2006-11-20T00:09:56.575Z

Sometimes I think I must be doing something wrong. Just being shouldn't take this much effort. But I'm strong and can get myself through this alone...right?Even if it takes asking rhetorical questions to my own website.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-19399462678466412812006-11-14T15:57:00.000Z2006-11-14T15:59:17.788Z

Just found this somewhere, don't know if I ever posted it on here - if I didn't here it is! It's pretty old, but I still agree with it...It annoys me when I see people doing or saying things because they want to be a certain kind of person. They look at a category or a stereotype and decide that that is the image they want to potray. I understand that people need these categories in order to make

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-11029576625860754212006-11-12T16:10:00.001Z2006-11-12T16:10:08.011Z

In Flanders Fieldsby John McCrae, May 1915In Flanders fields the poppies blowBetween the crosses, row on row,That mark our place; and in the skyThe larks, still bravely singing, flyScarce heard amid the guns below.We are the Dead. Short days agoWe lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,Loved and were loved, and now we lieIn Flanders fields.Take up our quarrel with the foe:To you from failing hands we

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-61269823526964949332006-11-11T19:28:00.000Z2006-11-11T19:46:28.527Z

"The heart dies a slow death. Shedding it's hopes like leaves, until one day there are none"From Memoirs of a Geisha. I read the book when it first came out, but only saw the film last night. I'd forgotten a lot of the detail - even how it ended, so it was enjoyable! It reminded me how beautiful Japan is though, and how much I love that satisfying clunk of wooden doors closing! (irrelevant, but

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-87549166694159488342006-11-09T19:33:00.000Z2006-11-09T20:05:18.971Z

I was talking to my mum the other day about her parents and their lives. I don't know very much about my mum's parents - her mum died before I was born, and while her dad only died about a year and a half ago, he wasn't the kind of person i could just sit down and chat to..But in a half an hour conversation, I learnt so much about him that I hadn't in 20 years. I knew that both of my grandfathers

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-9944507376711252472006-11-08T18:04:00.001Z2006-11-08T18:04:31.929Z

There was a boyA very strange enchanted boyThey say he wandered very far, very farOver land and seaA little shy and sad of eyeBut very wise was heAnd then one dayA magic day he passed my wayAnd while we spoke of many thingsFools and kingsThis he said to me"The greatest thing you'll ever learnIs just to love and be loved in return"

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-70682344272086059802006-11-06T18:17:00.000Z2006-11-06T18:18:21.261Z

Fire and Rain - James TaylorJust yesterday morning they let me know you were goneSusanne the plans they made put an end to youI walked out this morning and I wrote down this songI just cant remember who to send it toIve seen fire and Ive seen rainIve seen sunny days that I thought would never endIve seen lonely times when I could not find a friendBut I always thought that Id see you againWont you

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-49993611941218572412006-11-05T22:35:00.001Z2006-11-05T22:35:53.028Z

Fuck.

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-11058535270545308672006-11-04T14:44:00.001Z2006-11-04T14:44:46.564Z

Just came accross this on facebook - amused me!Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Archangel Michael found him on the seventh day resting. He enquired of God, "Where have you been?"God pointed downwards through the clouds. "Look Michael, look what I've made" said God.Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?""It's a planet," replied

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-52773765292791610482006-10-27T12:38:00.000+01:002006-10-27T12:52:58.773+01:00

Just came back from cambridge - was there to research management consultancy stuff and see a few people. Talked to a careers adviser about management consultancy - he said it would be tough for me and wasn't overly supportive at first - understandable considering my cv and the fact that i told him the civil service was actually my first choice! But he was helpful and told me how to optimise my

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-68944869608573074272006-10-20T11:23:00.000+01:002006-10-20T11:38:57.913+01:00

-Why does being very tired and being drunk seem to have the same effect on me? I come out with random nonsense via whatever method is available to me at the time. Actual conversation, msn, texting...blogging....-It's amazing how a child you are barely related to can bring out a maternal instinct. We had a 5 year old girl with us over the weekend, and somehow my maternal instinct just kicked in

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-16104359669359173002006-10-11T14:28:00.001+01:002006-10-11T14:28:17.203+01:00

Coming home to a dark and sleeping houseSometimes greeted by a swaying taillock up behind you, keep out the coldtip toe up to your den of technologyWaking up to the voices of strangersShuffling their way around your lifeturn on the radio for someone to talk tolistening to the woe of other livesFinding the will to get out of bedstretch out your body, ready for the dayguess the weather outside

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1160267445099551902006-10-08T01:24:00.000+01:002006-10-08T01:30:45.126+01:00

Something to get your brain going:Eternally I am 1 to 6, eternally I am 15 to 20, I am always 5, but I am never ever 21 unless I am flying, what am I ???and....A woman has 5 children and half of them are male? How can this be?

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1160177916764176202006-10-07T00:32:00.000+01:002006-10-07T00:38:36.783+01:00

There are too many conflicting thoughts in my head, and on different topics. I'm not sure I even know where to start sorting my head out.Walked into work this evening and a colleague told me I looked how she felt. It made me realise just how tired I actually am. The stuff I want to figure out needs some hard thinking about, I'm going to have to face up to things about myself that I'm not sure I

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1160055441121212972006-10-05T14:22:00.000+01:002006-10-05T14:37:21.206+01:00

This whole job hunting thing is getting harder and harder. I keep applying for jobs, and have had endless rejections. So many people I know are going through the same process, but it's still hard. My friends still at uni are carrying on with uni life and meeting new people, my friends at home are partnered up or away...and I know all these people are there for me, all I have to do is call them;

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1159913961932548802006-10-03T23:17:00.000+01:002006-10-03T23:19:21.950+01:00

I've just been to karate again...it's strange, I hate the idea of actually breaking someone's limbs (and having mine broken!) but I like the idea of being able to do it and defend myself if I ever have to!I always feel great after karate, can't really explain why, but I guess it doesn't matter! :)

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1159882888373579542006-10-03T14:41:00.000+01:002006-10-03T14:42:09.736+01:00

There were times when you thoughtYou were finally comfortable with lifeWith who you are and the way you lookand you no longer had to pretend to be content.Then something flicks a switch insideAnd it’s hard to look your friends in the eyeIn case they see that something has changedAnd they don’t understand the way you workMomentarily all you want in this hectic worldIs for just one of the six

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1159444918733922712006-09-28T12:37:00.000+01:002006-09-28T13:01:58.760+01:00

Martial arts, politics and periods - 3 things to report today, aren't you lucky!1. I went to karate for the first time in 3 months on Tuesday, and really enjoyed it...though I forgot just how evil karate instructors can be! I was a bit rusty, but not too bad considering I hadn't practiced at all in the time inbetween. BUT, my word does it hurt now!!! Somehow,the next day, my body didn't seem to

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1159136042201395692006-09-24T22:51:00.000+01:002006-09-24T23:14:02.220+01:00

While I was visiting my uni friends over the weekend, I noticed that I still have an old habit from when I was younger. The same thing happened again the other day when I met some friends from home, though I don't remember the exact context of either. I don't want this habit anymore...it's redundant in my life now. I want to write this for myself, so that if I catch myself doing it I can come

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1158962321824506722006-09-22T22:31:00.000+01:002006-09-22T23:02:13.506+01:00

Caught the end of the Charlotte Church Show last night...she was doing a duet with Nelly Furtado (who I seem to like!) and singing Gnarles Barkley's 'Crazy'...one of my favourite songs. It sounded awesome. Charlotte Church has an amazing voice, and combined with Nelly Furtado's, they did a great cover of the song. Was a good note to go to bed on (pun...possibly not intended).To change topic

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1158702321652542672006-09-19T22:39:00.000+01:002006-09-19T22:45:21.666+01:00

Well I did some painting and felt a lot better for it...strange how the mind works! Went to Bradford over the weekend and saw a few uni friends, was so good to spend time with them all - house felt very empty when I got home! Saw an old friend that I haven't seen in months the day after and chatted like no time had passed :)And today I got my sexy new phone - I love it!! Now normally I'm not one

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1158168048284058372006-09-13T17:54:00.000+01:002006-09-13T18:20:48.360+01:00

I want to draw but I'm uninspired.Feeling things that I don't want to feel.Thinking things I shouldn't.But everyone has their problems, you just have to deal with it! Wish I could just be creative, but when I sit down with a pencil and paper nothing comes out...I'm just blank. Playing stuff like the piano helps, but only for a short while, and not at all if my mum is around (she doesn't music or

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1157456794612574612006-09-05T12:31:00.000+01:002006-09-05T12:46:35.546+01:00

Right, I've been moaning a lot lately, and quite frankly, I'm starting to get bored at the mere thought of someone else having to read/listen to my rants!I woke up in such a good mood today, for no apparent reason. Just been reading through the news and there are so many fantastic and tragic things out there. So what if things aren't great at the moment? I know that it won't stay that way forever

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1157383919268356502006-09-04T16:28:00.000+01:002006-09-05T12:48:42.866+01:00

I can't believe Steve Irwin died! He was such an amazing person, I rememeber being awestruck when I saw him with the crocodiles on tv.At least he went in an interesting way...seems kind of fitting really. It must be so hard for his wife and children though. A large part of the world will miss Steve Irwin, but no one as much as his family, I'm sure.For those of you who don't know what I'm on about

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1156763187991023802006-08-28T12:05:00.000+01:002006-08-28T12:06:28.006+01:00

Oh dear, I really shouldn't post late at night - just read that last one through...I do whine a lot! Oh well, good to get these things out I guess :-s

prachinoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5305149.post-1156722096849751142006-08-28T00:40:00.000+01:002006-08-28T00:41:36.870+01:00

Been thinking lately.... why I am so desperate to get away from here? I love Manchester and my family, I know people here...why would I want to leave? Then I realised...loneliness hits you even harder when you're surrounded people that have known you your whole life or for a large chunk of it....and yet you still feel alone. There's so much in me that I have to share, that I want to share, but

prachinoreply@blogger.com0