Closer

I saw you from afar
Heart fell into my stomach
As I flew along the ground
Closer and closer to you

With a smile on your face
You slid towards me too
Your heart and stomach in place
Closer and closer we became

From the corner of their world
People watched with curious eyes
The meeting of two souls
That could not help but connect

But when our skin met
You felt something else
Inner mind focused on another
While our bond melded deeper in

Connected to you, I pulled away
Stretching at bonds so quickly made
But you resisted, I decided to stay
Alone here, while you dream of others.


No regrets right? That's what I decided a long time ago. I did what I had to do and while it's not perfect, it's still ok.

I'll be ok, I've been through worse and I'm stronger for it.

There's a first time for everything right?

*paces nervously up and down the room*

Wrote this the other day. Just realised that I haven't actually mentioned on here that I'm the lead singer in a band - yay! Wrote this as an attempt at some song lyrics....so then I can call myself a singer/songwriter! :)

A Way Through

Fresh air blows through her hair
In the centre of a whirlwind of time
The gods have been playing their game
Brushing his words past her ear

Storing his secrets behind those eyes
So many times she’s tried to find
A way through the words
A door through the time

His travels have been dark
But he’s kept his spirit safely away
The gods have been playing their game
Taunting his senses with her tears

Storing his secrets behind those eyes
So many times he’s tried to find
A way through the words
A door through the time

Fingers entwine as secrets escape
Their tender minds released at last
The gods have been playing their game
Creating a way through the words

Sometimes I wish I could be free from feelings and other people - just live in my own little world and be happy there alone, going where I want to go, doing what I want to do and saying what I want to say.

But I don't, I can't. My life is too tied up with other people lives. There are people whom I'm attached to and people who are attached to me. This is all fine until the attachements to each other don't meet up. Broken connections in the web.

*sigh*

This is a beautiful song...

The Magic Numbers - I See You, You See Me.

I never wanted to love you, but that's okay
I always knew that you'd leave me anyway
But darling when I see you, you see me
I asked the boys if they'd let me go out and play
They always said that you'd hurt me anyway
But darling when I see you, I see me

And it's alright
I never thought I'd fall in love again
It's alright
I look to you as my only friend
It's alright
I never thought that I could feel there's something
Rising, rising in my veins
Looks like it's happened again

I never thought that you wanted for me to stay
So I left you with the girls that came your way
And darling when I see you I see me

I often thought that you'd be better off left alone
Well throw a circle round and ... with broken bones
But darling when I see you, I see me

It's alright
I never thought I'd fall in love again
It's alright
I look to you as my only friend
It's alright
I never thought that I could feel there's something
Rising, rising in my veins
Looks like it's happened again

You always looked like you had something else on your mind
When I try to tell you, you tell me "nevermind"
But darling when I see you, you see me

I wanna tell you that I never loved anyone else
You wanna tell me that you're better off by yourself
But darling when I see you, you see me

Oooh, oo-oo-oooh...
This is not what I'm like, this is not what I do
This is not what I'm like, I think I'm falling for you

I never thought
This is not what I'm like, this is not what I do
I never thought
This is not what I'm like, I think I'm falling for you

I never thought that I could feel there's something
Rising, rising in my veins

And it looks like I feel there's something
Rising, rising in my veins
Looks like it's happened again

Well the headcold I had was apparently sinusitis according to my dad - he said it wouldn't go away for a while though. It has gone, and I feel much better...but I still don't feel quite myself. I'm not ill, but I am getting lightheaded every now and again..I feel a removed from all of this sometimes, especially when my head is like that. It's a bit unsettling, wish it would go away.

Just came back from India a few days ago...had a great time, was so good to see my family, especially my grandparents. Spent a lot of the time rushing around trying to visit various members of the family, but went to a couple of new places (Patiala and Chandigarh), both of which were lovely places - especially Chandigarh. The only downside was that it was freezing! But i'm used to the cold so I guess it wasn't that bad!

Ok, that's it for now, may write more later if I feel like it - feeling a bit crap right now, have got some kind of head cold! Off to uni again on the weekend, it's so like leading a double life, it's bizarre.

traa x

This struck me when I saw this in a shop the other day:

"There is no way to peace, peace is the way"

If only we could all remember that.

Where to begin?

I've actually forgotten most of the stuff I wanted to write about (see last post), but one thing I do remember from a month ago:

As part of my course, I often end up analysing or at least thinking about the basics of human nature, why we act how we do etc. Somehow I got thinking about territoriality, how it runs through our whole lives.

Starting from individual people - everyone has their own idea of personal space that generally they don't like being invaded. 'This much area around me is mine'. It's our own piece of territory that we carry around with us.

Next we can go to our homes. Inside our homes, most of us have our own bedroom that we make ours, or at least our own bed and space around it. The house itself has boundaries, that either stop at the front door if its an apartment, or extend to the garden or driveway for a house. If anyone intrudes into the building without our permission, we feel uneasy, even violated.

Beyond this, we have streets and neighbourhoods and villages and towns. While we may not defend them as fiercely (through practicallity maybe?), we consider them as our home turf, our shared territory. This even extends into north and south (when considering England anyway).

Even above this level though is the fiece protection of countries. The existence of countries at all shows how territorial we are. Countries after all, when it comes down to it, are just lines drawn on a map. These boundaries on the ground are patrolled and monitored...just incase someone we don't want tries to get in. Thousands of wars and battles have been fought over territory - the more territory you have, the more people and resources you have under your control, the more power you have.

Buzz Aldrin (and one of the 'Space Cadets' on channel 4's latest reality TV show) said that the earth looked so peaceful from space, it was hard to imagine any wars going on down there. I guess from space the continents just look like giant landmasses, all merging into one another or into the sea, with the view being interuppted by swirling clouds. I guess it all seems kind of pointless from up there, squabbling over who can and can't come into this bit of land, and who's patch of land it is.



Don't get me wrong, I think a degree of territorialism is neccessary - I am human after all, but I think perspective is needed sometimes.

Had quite a few things I've wanted to put on here lately, but just haven't got round to it. I want to write them properly though so I won't do it now...basically a long winded way of saying I'm still here! (Probably to no-one, but just in case it's not just me reading this!)