Flowers

As the flowers on my desk strained towards the solitary light
I slipped away, further into the shadows
Taking my tears and confusion away from the world,

But not so far so that I couldn’t pretend to still exist,
just to a place where I could be detached in peace
Away from people who could desert me,

When they decided I was no longer worth their trouble.
I left the light on for the flowers to have,
as a beacon for if I ever decided to return, and check they still lived.

Sheryl Crow -Strong enough

God, I feel like hell tonight
Tears of rage I cannot fight
I’d be the last to help you understand
Are you strong enough to be my man?

Nothing’s true and nothing’s right
So let me be alone tonight
Cause you can’t change the way I am
Are you strong enough to be my man?

Lie to me
I promise I’ll believe
Lie to me
But please don’t leave

I have a face I cannot show
I make the rules up as I go
It’s try and love me if you can
Are you strong enough to be my man?

When I’ve shown you that I just don’t care
When I’m throwing punches in the air
When I’m broken down and I can’t stand
Will you be man enough to be my man?

Lie to me
I promise I’ll believe
Lie to me
But please don’t leave

I really like that song, its stuck in my head!

Why were so many of my friends born within the same few weeks! In my family there were 3 birthdays in October, 3 more from my uni friends and Hannah's 1st week of november! Tis fun cos means lots of parties and celebrating malarky, but sooo many people to buy presents for!

But actually, seriously, I was thinking today in my lecture....all my problems are actually fairly trivial. We were being shown pictures of these kids who were starving and had protein deficiencies and things. I'm lucky enough to be able to dwell on the less important things because I've got the basic necessary things for living. I've got clothes, a place to live, enough money, a decent education, great friends and importantly, my health.

Such a cliche I know (hopefully didn't make you vom too much!) , but it really does help to remind myself of that when I'm upset sometimes.

It was all so sudden, so instantly gone.
In one conversation he set himself free.
And the good memories keep flooding back
Bringing with them a new ache for me.

To add to the constant one that sits and stays
Sometimes bringing anger, sometimes tears.
Work holds little of my attention these days
Staring at walls and playing with my hair.

It was all so sudden
When did you change your mind?
The clock timed out before I was ready.
I don’t understand.

I want to ask him to explain what I did
But he only makes small talk, makes more pain.
Meanwhile the papers pile higher around
While I consider whether to include him in my day.

It was all so sudden
When did you change your mind?
The clock timed out before I was ready
I don’t understand.

When all is said and done, the weather and love are the two elements about which one can never be sure. - Alice Hoffman

So true :-)

REM -Half a World Away


This could be the saddest dusk
I’ve ever seen
Turn to a miracle
High alive
My mind is racing
As it always will
My hand is tired, my heart aches
I’m half a world away here
My head sworn
To go it alone
And hold it along
Haul it along
And hold it
Go it alone
Hold it along and hold, hold

This lonely deep sit hollow
I’m half a world
Half the world away
My shoes are gone
My life spent
I had too much to drink
I didn’t think
And I didn’t think of you
I guess that’s all I needed
To go it alone
And hold it along
Haul it along
And hold it
Blackbirds, backwards, forwards and fall and hold, hold

Oh, this lonely world is wasted
Pathetic eyes high alive
Blind to the tide that turns the sea
This storm it came up strong
It shook the trees
And blew away our fear
I couldn’t even hear

To go it alone
And hold it along
Haul it along
And hold it
To go it alone
And hold it along
Haul it along
To go it alone
And hold it along
Haul it along
And hold it
Blackbirds, backwards, forwards, and fall and hold hold

This could be the saddest dusk
I’ve ever seen
Turn to a miracle
High alive
My mind is racing
As it always will
My hands tired, my heart aches
I’m half a world away and go

The clouds had fallen from the sky to the paddock last night. It was beautiful and eerie at thee same time; standing in a misty field, looking up at a clear starry sky.

Dashing away with a smoothing iron, she stole my heart away.

Hehe, remembered that this morning when i was half asleep. The brain is a funny thing :-)